Death tolls

Posted by Johnny at 8:58 a.m.

Here's one for the Israel / Lebanon war: death toll.
Here's one for the Iraq / USA war: death toll.

Kind of puts things into perspective, doesn't it?

Fantastic Questions

Posted by Johnny at 12:53 p.m.

From Tough Questions:

• Why is faith—believing something for which there is no evidence—a virtue? Since Christians say it is, then why has God given us a brain?
  
  
• Why is rational skepticism a vice? If Christianity is true, won’t the truth hold up under scrutiny? Shouldn’t the church welcome and promote rational skepticism as a way of confirming and spreading the faith when people see that it fails to undermine Christianity? Why isn’t skeptical literature studied and refuted in Sunday School classes?
  
  
• Where is the justice in punishing Jesus for our sins? If our courts of law were to accept the punishment of someone else in the place of the criminal, we would not say that justice has been done, but that injustice has been added to injustice. Would the church have me believe that two wrongs make a right?
  
  
• Why pray? If it changes God’s mind then he is not sovereign. If it does not change God’s mind then it is superfluous.
  
  
• Why is God concerned about humans at all? If God is infinite then we must be infinitesimal to him, invisibly tiny specks in the universe. If God is eternal then we must be instantaneously expunged flits of life, too transient for an eternal being to notice. Christianity has the hallmarks of a religion of human scale and fallibility made by priests for their own ends.
  
  
• Why are women treated as chattel and inferior to men throughout the Bible (The evidence is too overwhelming to cite even a representative portion of the relevant scriptures, but a few of the more explicit examples are 1 Corinthians 11:3,9; 1 Timothy 2:12-14.)
  
  
• Why do Christians pray about whether to marry someone, when Paul says that if they want to get married they should just do it (1 Corinthians 7)?
  
  
• Why has the church done so little good and so much harm in 2000 years, while science has demonstrated remarkable progress in only 500 years? What does it say of the church that the period when it dominated western history is universally called the Dark Ages, while the period of breaking away from church dogma is called the Enlightenment?
  
  
• How did liberal Christians and their churches come to exist? If they are inclined to believe, why did they not continue to believe the “fundamentals”? Could it be because the fundamentals have insurmountable problems that discredit them? If the “fundamentals” are unnacceptably flawed for liberals, why do they believe at all?

Discuss.

Hovind Update

Posted by Johnny at 10:56 a.m.

He and his wife were in court today and refused to plead guilty/not guilty because they consider themselves missionaries and thus exempt from taxes. Hovind (god, what an awful name) instead, pleaded "subornation of false muster". I can't really figure out what he's pleading here, so if anyone has any insight, I would appreciate that. Here's a quote from the Pensacola News-Journal:

Neither he nor his wife and co-defendant, Jo, wanted to enter a traditional plea of guilty or not guilty. The Hovinds question the court's right to try them. They consider themselves missionaries exempt from taxes to a government that, incidentally, is providing them with attorneys.

But Magistrate Miles Davis wanted them to enter pleas just as any other citizen would. "If they don't wish to enter a plea, I'll enter one for them," Davis said.When asked by the prosecutor to list his residence, Kent Hovind said he lives in "the church of Jesus Christ ... located all over the world."

(...) Then, Hovind offered another wrinkle. "I would like to plead subornation of false muster," he said, announcing a defense I haven't heard in 30 years of hanging around courtrooms. The precedent is not good. A man in the state of Washington tried a similar defense a few years ago, claiming he was a "citizen of heaven" and not subject to state laws. But a court there ruled that when in Washington, do as Washington law requires, and found him guilty.

What a wacky guy.

Back From the Hiatus

Posted by Reid at 10:40 p.m.

It’s been over a month of lying low and not posting, and I’m back. Most people probably don’t care…hell, I don’t even care that I am back; it’s just something to do.

Did you know there was a Tsunami in Indonesia? I didn’t…until my mom told me. Where the FUCK is the news on this? Even the headlines on BBC have this tucked away where it didn’t jump out at me. 530 people are known to be dead, thousands needing aid. Funny, I didn’t hear it on the news tonight. It was over shadowed by some pathetic “Canadians” complaining about the conditions on a boat and how the washrooms weren’t clean. Hey, fucker, I bet your clan made it worse than it was. Would you rather be blown up? Shut the FUCK up. Are you paying for it? Shut the FUCK up. You can’t have been that harmed because you are bitching about it. I don’t even understand half the shit you are complaining about. Shut the FUCK up.

“Everybody was vomiting on everybody,” said Nohra. “It was very miserable. The kids were scared, screaming, panicking.”

SHUT THE FUCK UP. It’s not my fault that you can’t hold your vomit. I’m not surprised your kids were scared and that it was crowded. To provide these amenities to you, we would have had to have an increased staff and helped evacuate less people. Is your comfort more important than someone else’s life? You might think so, but either way, you know what I am going to say. Shut the fuck up. But wait, there is more.

“Those left behind in Lebanon after the first ship left Thursday vented their frustrations at what they described as a slow and disorganized evacuation.”

Yep, your choice to head back to Lebanon, why are we responsible to save you? It was a rushed effort, and yes it probably was disorganized. How come you didn’t have a flight booked out? Weren’t planning ahead? Shut the fuck up

Then there is this comment:

“I used to say I’m Lebanese and Canadian and proud of it,” said Zeinab Farhat, 46, of Fort McMurray, Alta. “But now, I’m not proud. When I see the children suffering in the sun, waiting here. I look at the kids and I can’t believe it.”

What a fucking pecker. At first, I thought he was no longer proud to be Lebanese, but reading in context he is actually not proud to be Canadian. Why is he waiting in line to be let back into Canada? Fuck you dude, you can stay there you un-grateful bitch. I bet you’re the kind of person that will quit a job with no notice because you will get a dollar extra somewhere else. You’re the type of fucker that makes this world worse because you only think of yourself. It’s sad that people are this way, but it is even sadder that they put up a big enough fuss to make the news. They need to learn to shut the FUCK up and be grateful for what they are getting. Unfortunately, there are many people from Canada that are the same way.

Canada is one of the best countries in the world, we are really spoiled here. Some people are spoiled rotten to the point of being bad people. We have a lot of amazing people in this country right now, and we have a lot of shit. All countries have their share of good and bad, but honestly, the stuff these people are complaining about is just ridiculous.

Now an extreme leap…I think this lack of gratefulness stems from shitty holiday selection. Odd, eh? Consider, however, that most people think that being well traveled makes your opinion more “worldly” and more “proper”. People all want to be “cultured” and sophisticated. How much culture are they getting from a resort in Mexico? Or staying in Sydney, Australia? Yep, going to places where life is easier than here or similar to here really “cultures” you. So many people think Australia is such a great vacation spot, but then when asked where they went, it was all the major cities. Do you sail? No. Do you windsurf? No. What did you do? Toured around, saw the sites.

Ahh, yes, the sites. Would you consider seeing the sights in Edmonton a valuable, culturing experience? I sure wouldn’t, nor would I consider seeing the white beach of a resort. Want to get a real traveling experience? How about heading to one of the opium fields in Thailand, or the rice patties in China? Go see what life is really like in the country that you are claiming to have seen. People bitch about going on boring tours and just wanting to go back to the resort. What a waste of a holiday. The tours are the one part where you could learn about the history behind the people. A part where you could learn about why people do things they do. That’s what you travel for. Not to kick your feet up in the sunshine to have a drink. That’s a party, and that’s a LOT of money for a week of partying.

I don’t need to tell you where your money should go, we have fuckers like Bono (U2) to do that, and people like that piss me off. I am just saying, don’t tell me how cultured you are if all you did while in a foreign country was shop. Don’t tell me that you’ve seen the suffering in the world until you see someone brushing their teeth in the same river that someone just took a shit in upstream, and the boat you’re in is leaking gas into. Plus someone was washing their clothes in it with detergent too. Don’t forget the colour either – shit brown. And most of all, don’t complain about the way you are being treated by one of the best countries in the world, who is willing to help you out.

Obviously, the you is not directed at anyone reading this…but a good number of people here in Canada think they are better than everyone else and need to be treated as such. I wish people like this would just go away and we could all put a smile on our face and get down to what’s really important. What’s really important in life? The hell if I know...I’m as fucked up as the rest.

(Quotes from CBC)

Many apologies for this personal post

Posted by Johnny at 12:17 a.m.

I just got off the phone with someone who caused me much grief 6 months ago (check the January-February archives). After a several month hiatus, she found her way back into my life seemingly wanting to try again.

Last night, I discovered that her mind had changed. Again, she didn't feel the same for me as I did for her, but this time she was dealing with the new Johnny. This is the Johnny who doesn't let people dick him around. I expressed some bold and presumptuous hypotheses as to the fluctuation of her feelings, the most important of which was an unnamed fear that exists in her mind - a fear that prevented her from releasing her boa constrictor grip on her life and truly becoming free.

Last night, she didn't know what that fear was, but tonight she did: her mother. More specifically, her mother has issues with me and it is somehow severely affecting her to the point that she can't love me. Granted, that she most likely has issues of her own with me (none of which she could or would name), but this mother issue was serious enough to be the topic of tonight's conversation.

I won't go into the details, but I will say that I laughed at all three of the issues she mentioned that her mom has with me. This was probably in poor taste, but I explained my actions. You see, the issues mentioned were trivial to me, and the fact that these were important to her made me laugh. I wasn't laughing at her at all. I was laughing at how glad I was that I had escaped what would have undoubtedly been a shitty situation.

Of course, the outcome wasn't a happy one for me. I was looking forward to having my universal confidant and inamorata back, but the reality is that my feelings for her would have gone unreciprocated.

All I can do is thank her for making the right decision at this point, but something tells me that this story isn't over.

More Music

Posted by Johnny at 9:31 p.m.

First of all, I wasn't criticizing Michael Brecker in the last post. I should have written, "I wouldn't buy a Michael Brecker CD to hear a sax player..." instead of using the word "didn't". Apologies to Michael B. and Brett Mc.

Muse - Black Holes and Revelations (2006)
Think early Radiohead, but not. Vocalist/Guitarist Michael Bellamy sounds part Thom Yorke, part Freddy Mercury, part Bono, and mostly Michael Bellamy. The band has a tight sound, which is more rock than electronica, and serves plenty of sweet hooks for your listening enjoyment.

The album itself starts with a gradually building piece entitled Take a Bow that features their synth playing quick, escalating arpeggios while Michael sings "Burn, you will burn in hell" to an unnamed political leader, who could easily be George W. Bush. The building nature of the song serves to be one of the best climaxes in an alt-rock song since Radiohead's Paranoid Android.

The rest of the album plays with their sound, shifting it left and right of the rock spectrum while maintaining a solid and recognizable foundation. The best part of the album is its conciseness, as it runs approximately 45 minutes in length: the standard length of a single vinyl LP. Thank you, Muse. As with Peeping Tom (and as you'll soon read, Mr. Bungle), you understand that truly great albums know when to quit. This one is definitely worth a listen.

Malo (self titled, 1973)
You might not be aware of this, but Carlos Santana's brother, Jorge, also played guitar and Malo was his band. The word malo is Spanish for bad. This is not an accurate description of the band in the least.

The comparisons to Carlos' work are unavoidable, but this is actually a good thing for Jorge, since he comes out on top. I've never really been a fan of Santana because his music just doesn't do it for me. Most of it seems so contrived, as if to say, "Hey everybody! This is Latin music! Isn't that crazy?"

Malo, on the other hand, doesn't need to force anything. They're a bunch of great musicians (drums/perc, bass, guitar, organ/keys, horns, vocals) who play what I would consider to be a cross between Tower of Power, Deep Purple, and the Gypsy Kings. The songs are mostly long-form jams that feature soloists from the whole band (not just the guitar) . In spite of the Latin jam-style, the songs still maintain great direction and never bore you with a round-robin solo style.

Unfortunately, this album is hard to come by in the city, so I had to order it from a great music distributor who runs out of Florida and sells through Amazon. So, if you want to have a listen, which you should, you'll probably have to come to me.

Mr. Bungle - California (1999)
To finish off this batch of reviews, I once again find myself enamoured with a Mike Patton release. This is the last recording from his Mr. Bungle project (so far) and is easily the most accessible and concise (another 45-minute snapshot of goodness). Mr. Bungle is known for squeezing the widest variety of song styles you can imagine onto one CD, and this release delivers in spades. The only common theme in the album's sound, aside from Patton's virtuoso vocals, is that there is no unifying sound.

Even within a song, you never know what to expect. One song could start out as a surprisingly trippy 50's pop tune and switch to 2 seconds of a 6/8 Latin groove in the same tempo, then quickly switch back. That's just the warped mind of the Patton hard at work. Some of the songs hint at his trip hop work in Peeping Tom, which came 7 years later. Other songs are warped takes on overdone styles, such as placing electronic drum grooves and distorted vocals in a Beach Boys style surf rock tune. When you realize that you aren't supposed to figure it out, you can just sit back and enjoy it.

One of the album highlights is entitled Ars Moriendi, Latin for the art of death. At the beginning, it could easily be a distorted version of a bonus track from the Fiddler on the Roof soundtrack. It then shifts into some kind of techno-inspired Klezmer, and briefly into the heavy metal equivalent and back again. With interludes into odd time signature vocal extravaganzas, the piece returns to the fantastic Klezmer melody, complete with dueling clarinet and metal guitars. Fantastic.

My other highlight of the moment is the tune entitled Vanity Fair, which is the psychedelic version of doo-wop. The vocals are fantastic, as always, and the lyrics begin with "You're not human, you're a miracle / A creature with an animal's head." I love it. Patton plays with the key signature like a rubber band as he mmm bop's his way to brilliance.

This album may also be hard to track down, considering I bought the last copy from the impressive in-store playlist at A&B sound South. It wasn't even packaged, but the salesman was kind enough to let me have it. I have a feeling he was just happy to talk to someone who shared his taste in music.

Death and Taxes... and Kent Hovind

Posted by Johnny at 11:13 a.m.

Apparently, Dr. Dino (Hovind) forgot about the old addage, "The only two certainties in life are death and taxes." He has been arrested for 17 years of tax evasion, totalling more than $450,000. He paid his employees in cash as "missionaries" to avoid taxes, and now it's coming up to bite him in the ass.

Here's my favourite part of the article:

Kent Hovind, who often calls himself "Dr. Dino," has been sparring with the IRS for at least 17 years on his claims that he is employed by God, receives no income, has no expenses and owns no property.

What a fucking idiot. Sure, the US Government is a hotbed of rampant religion, but the good old IRS doesn't recognize God as a legitimate employer. They also don't respond well to threats, which he has made many times, according to the article.

Not only are they making 58 charges against him, they took away his passport and guns so that he couldn't escape the country.

Justice is served, and my day just got that much better.

Rants/Praise for Music

Posted by Johnny at 11:55 p.m.

I haven't really done this on the site before, but I'm going to give it a shot: music reviews.

Country Music (recently, in general)
Ok, I'm not typically one to make judgements on a whole genre of music, but what the fuck? I was listening to country in a bar tonight with Reid and I was trying to figure out why I didn't like it. The reason is that none of it encouraged me to think in the very least. It was all pretty much the twang equivalent of party rock, but not nearly as good because the music sucked as much as the lyrics. I mean, who wants to hear a song where some guy tells his girlfriend to get a job? It wasn't even witty, it was pretty much, "I'm a working man, so you should work too." So pithy. It really stimulates the lobes.

The only pure country music I've ever liked is some of Dwight Yokham's work, but that's mostly because the melody's are fantastic and the songs have emotion. So, my faithful reader base of 3-4, is there any country music worth my time? I'd like to know that at least 2% of the genre isn't crap, but I haven't been successful so far, nor do I have the desire to pursue this question any further. Thus, I delegate.

John McLaughlin - Industrial Zen (2006)
There's a reason I stopped listening to new jazz, and this is it. I thought, "sweet, John McLaughlin of the Mahavishnu Orchestra just released a new album. That'll be a nice diversion of his brand of unique rock-jazz fusion for sure." How I was wrong. This is the generic / muzak side of the line that fusion players straddle with every CD they release. Dave Weckl has been on the wrong side of this line since Master Plan, but drummers keep buying just to absorb his instrumental prowess. That's not jazz. I didn't buy a Michael Brecker CD to hear a sax player go through every scale he knows at break-neck speeds, nor did I buy a John McLaughlin CD to hear shitty melodies played by synths and over-processed guitars, saxes, and drums. Back to Inner Mounting Flame for me.

Robert Fripp - Exposure (1979, reissued on CD in 2006)
As with John McLaughlin, Robert Fripp is a relatively obscure face in music that not many would know. If anyone has ever heard of King Crimson, Fripp would be their mastermind/guitarist. He's one of the most innovative guitarists in the world and continually stretches the boundaries of guitar sound past its breaking point. In King Crimson, his contribution was a huge, yet eclectic sound, especially in the later years. At some point, his work in King Crimson led him to invent a technique to achieve essentially infinite sustain with his various effects, which he used to create what he called soundscapes. Personally, I haven't been able to really get into his soundscapes much, because I don't reserve enough time in a day to just sit and listen to music.

Thus, I bought his only solo release that wasn't a soundscape. In fact, it's quite a mixed bag of different styles, ranging from punkish tendencies, to Crimsonesque heavy prog riffs, to just plain weird stuff. The vocalists he recruited for the job were great, especially the woman. On the title track, she sings/screams the word "exposure" over top of a sweet riff and guys spelling out the same word in the background. Sweet shit. The songs are too varied to go into detail, but I'd recommend giving it a listen to anyone who wants to be continually surprised when they listen to an album.

Peeping Tom (self titled, 2006)
As usual, I save the best for last (pleasure-delayer, I am). This is also the album that I didn't think I would like at all, given the base genre, which is Trip Hop. I wasn't even sure what trip hop was, but the name sounds a lot like hip hop, so I had fairly low expectations. What I found was a rare gem that completely shattered my expectations.

In case you're interested, this is a Mike Patton album. He was the front man for such projects as Faith No More, Mr. Bungle, the Fantomas, Tomahawk, Lovage, and even the Dillinger Escape Plan for a very brief stint (a really cool EP). I doubt most of these bands are on anyone's radar, but most of these groups were active in the last 5-10 years, which would be impressive in itself if you ignored the fact that he has his own label and often takes the producer's chair. He's been called the side-project king and is easily among the top 5 vocalists in rock. The man's voice is quite literally an instrument, and he uses it to its fullest capacity in all of his projects.

Peeping Tom finds Patton collaborating with an impressive list of featured artists (yes, like they do in rap). I thought it was a joke at first, especially since I saw Norah Jones' name listed as a feature. More on this later. Anyway, the music is somewhat of a cross between hip hop and rock, which turns out to be really cool. The foundation layers are real instruments (drums, bass, some guitar, keys) so it doesn't have that shitty rap sound. And for the most part, Patton (and the featured artists) are singing, so there's only a small bit of rap that you have to put up with, and this bit is actually not bad.

The first thing I noticed is that the songs have fantastic melodies. The first one has a Patton-ted (haha) vocal freakout for a chorus, as I was hoping for. The others make use of his voice for effect predominantly in the background, but it really makes repeated listens rewarding.

The lyrics, as expected, were clever and more mainstream-ready than his previous work. The song "Mojo" is written from the point of view of a drug addict, but it's fairly tame compared to anything off of Alice In Chains' Dirt album. Other songs have varying subject matter, but they're tied together by some killer grooves and melodies. A lot of it rocks pretty hard too and, of course, Patton's vocals are in top form when he takes the lead.

My favourite song on the album is called "Sucker," and features Norah Jones dropping the MF bomb. I couldn't believe it when I heard it the first time. I mean, her voice makes the track unbelievably sexy as it is, but when she sings/breathes/oozes the following line, in triple harmony with herself, "What makes you think you're my only lover / the truth kind of hurts don't it, motherfucker," I almost creamed my jeans. My new goal in life is to have sex with Norah Jones, and have her tell me that exact line after I tell her that I love her. I can't believe he convinced her to sing that.

No matter what your preconceptions are of trip hop / rock / etc, this album is definitely worth a listen. It's growing on me like a coating of delicious chocolate (I'm on drugs).

I'll be back with another similar post sometime next week, hopefully.

Impromptu Camping

Posted by Johnny at 9:06 p.m.

Reid & Colin
After Shotgunning

Amanda & Reid
Disgusted or Scared?

Johnny
On Guitar

Reid
It's probably just water...

Where are all the single people?

Posted by Johnny at 12:40 a.m.

Canada Day, Prince's Island Park. Reid and I are strolling around the beautiful downtown park thinking, "Gee willickers, it's a beautiful day. I bet we'll see a whole bunch of purdy ladies!" Although we were right, we mostly saw boyfriends, wedding rings, pregnancies, and families attached to thesed purdy ladies. This prompted the question, where are the single women on Canada day?

Is there some sort of secret hideout to which eligible single people go in order to have a good time and hook up? Why was I not informed?!?!

I'm sure Sara was thinking the same thing as us, except about guys. As far as I know, she and her friends were the only single people we saw today.

Now when I say I'm looking for single people, I don't mean I'm looking for bar folk who just want to hook up. I'm sure they aren't looking for me and I'm not looking for them. I'm looking for the single people who are smart, funny, attractive, etc. and also want some kind of actual relationship. Why are they so hard to find?

Maybe all these people are so fed up that they can't find anyone like them, that they just waste their party time in their basement, blogging about how they can't find people with similar interests and goals. That would be the ultimate injustice.

PS: I got a big hug from Tristin (see previous posts) today, which is the most action I've had in many months. Fucking A (scroll down to the F's).

PPS: Visit Kevin's blog, Flunked Divine.