I'm stupid, but mildly amazing

Posted by Johnny at 10:44 p.m.

So yesterday, I found myself in a little predicament. You see, I had 2 assignments due, plus a lab, and I started the day with 15% of it completed. I barely finished the first assignment at 2:00, handed it in, and then finished my lab at 4:00. I started the other assignment close to 5:00 and it was done by 10:00. I figure I spent 8-9 hours in the computer lab and 3 hours in a different computer lab.

This was stupid, but the last assignment was done amazingly and surprisingly well. My cat and mouse threads didn't run into each other! Woo, go locks and condition variables!



I hope all 2 of the people who read this blog are coming to my cabaret, which is October 29 (sat) at 8:00pm in the North Glenmore Park Community assoc. It's going to be good times. Tickets are available at the door.

Ooh, more news: I might have an internship. This awesome company, Quadrus Development is thinking of hiring me as their first intern ever. That would be amazing if they did because they're doing really cutting edge stuff.

Ok, here's some actual news:

• Too much time on their hands: this prof is kind of wacko. He wants photo evidence leading to the live capture of either Bigfoot, Yeti, or the Loch Ness Monster. Umm, is this really how college students want their tuiton spent? The short answer is yes, because that would be awesome. Woo! Yeti!
• Stupid Florida, this is the stupidest stabbing ever. A Walgreens employee stabbed another employee because she wanted to microwave her soup first. Oh my GOD! No one gets between me and my soup! You will DIE for delaying my soup eating process. So ... incredibly ... stupid.
• I need to work on my manners. I can never remember how much to tip the gamekeeper or which knife to use for my shepards pie. The British are offering a finishing school for men that lasts 3 days and helps with manners and etiquette. I would absolutely love to attend that! It's my all-time biggest dream. Actually, that was sarcasm, but I'm sure my girlfriend wouldn't complain if I signed up. I can never remember if the knife goes on the right or the left...
• The "professional" men and women of Europe (ie: the sex workers) want to be recognized as actual professionals and given the same rights as other workers. This is all fine and dandy, but you have to see the picture of the French prostitute in the article. I'm not quite sure if she would qualify for rights due to the fact that she isn't quite human.

I'm done for now, later peeps.

School is killing me softly with its song.

Posted by Johnny at 8:12 p.m.

Read the subject.

My one objective is to pass every course I take, especially SENG 443. My prof refuses to answer questions properly via email, stating that the answers were given in class and I should have either been in class or asked a teammate. Well, I asked my teammates and they couldn't give me the answer, so I had to email him! Then after refusing to answer email and lecturing me about going to lecture, he has the nerve to tell me that I should have come up with my questions earlier in the day and seen him in person. By that point I stopped caring and left the class.

Anyways, I seem to be complaining a lot. Bitch, bitch, bitch all the live long day. Here's some news:

• This family is insane and the wife must have a deathwish for her vagina. They just had their 16th child and are planning for the next. Religion: 1, contraception: 0.
• Rob some banks and have some sex. Sounds like a good ol' time, until you get caught doing the latter. I wonder if the police let them finish before hauling the guy away...
• Silly python. Alligators are for kids? This python tried to eat an alligator and it split in two. That would be like me trying to eat Shaquille O'Neil or something. Natural selection is at work here folks.
• Frankenhorse: this lab worker was accused of stealing parts of human brains and injecting them into horses to make them run faster. I can't think of anything to say about that, except "IT'S ALIVE!"
• The squirrels have found the crack. They dig in gardens that crack addicts use as temporary storage, then they take the crack for themselves. This guy recalls seeing an ill-looking squirrel with bloodshot eyes digging for crack. I don't know if this is funny or sad. They should set up little rehab trees for the squirrels to get them back on the straight-and-narrow and in search of nuts. Mmm, nuts.

My comments were sucking today, sorry guys. At least I got to type the words "vagina," "nuts," and "sex" in the same post.

Nothing intersting

Posted by Johnny at 4:26 p.m.

I am not writing anything interesting.

Now that that's out of the way, I'm looking forward to the weekend. I just realized that I have become so busy with school, that Kathryn beat me to suggesting that we do something fun over the long weekend. I'm always the one itching to have fun, but I just assumed that I would be doing homework all weekend. That caught me off guard, and I'll take it as a sign that I'm working too hard. Thus, I will devote one day this weekend to doing very little homework, having fun with Kat, and hopefully getting some recording done. That would be cool.

Time for fun:

• Sony exploits Jesus. They decided to advertise the 10th anniversary of Playstation by putting some guy in a crown of thorns and showing the catchphrase, "10 Years of Passion." This pissed of lots of Italians and other Catholics, as one could imagine. I may not agree with 95% of Christianity, but I still respect their beliefs. For shame, Sony. Oh, and I apologize for the KKK thing a couple posts back :) This blog should have a disclaimer.
  
• This guy in India was such a momma's boy, that he lived with her corpse for 20 years after she died. That is FUCKING SICK. In fact, that reminds me a little bit of this really popular horror movie, but not quite the same. Beware of English professors.
• Nicolas Cage is weirder than I thought: he named is newborn son Kal-el, which is the birthname of Superman. Yes, Superman, the comic book character. That's a little presumptuous isn't it? Why not just skip the obscurity and call him Superman. Better yet, call him Baron von Longcock and guarantee him a career in porn.
• This is probably the second worst thing that could happen to a guy. He went in for some kind of microwave-oriented therapy for his dick, and it came out half-burned. It literally burned his flesh. So now he has to have surgery to remove the dead parts, which will significantly reduce his size. Never trust doctors.
• Typhoon Longwang (!) hit China recently. From what I gathered, no one has died from it, so they're really taking it like champions. With something that size, you just need to loosen up, grab on to something, and take it. Longwang translates to "Dragon King", in case you were wondering.
  
• I can't believe this worked. A doctor prescribed his patient sex for her back pain. The sex was with him and he charged her for it. I don't know which is worse: his prescription or her stupidity. Now she's suing him, so maybe she wasn't so stupid after all.

Have a long weekend and may Thanksgiving make you fat.